HELP! Is ML to try to reconnect a mistake?

[trampledheart]

BND,

I haven't felt like doing anything to make myself happy, just trying to get things in order... I got an attorney and have petitioned for legal sep (H didn't want to do mediation). I'm supposed to be finish filing out docs (income&expense etc) for Atty to get spousal support but haven't finished yet, spoke to a financial planner (free consult) on Tues who said I should try to talk to husband first and maybe we can save legal fees.

H didn't complain during marriage, we just didn't have a connection since he traveled so much. I started to suspect there was a relationship with his female boss after he got a text message from her that he was concealed and refused to tell me about(later I found out from her that it was about going skiing that weekend). After he left, and I kept asking him what's going on, and he said that he doesn't want to tell me anything about his friends/coworkers, that my calling his female boss to find out what the text message was about was crazy and threatening our livelihood. He never admitted to her being the OW but when he left, I think he stayed with at her place initially and before she sent back to Germany, she gave him her 2 yr old car. So I think she was an OW at the time. (Now he has a new OW).

I did notice one thing that was bothering me for about a year and a half before he left, he started taking Viagra, kept trying to have a sex in a certain position that I didn't want/like...