I can understand your anger. Sounds like even though someone who is not involved is giving a totally objective view of what may happen, she is still trying to justify what she is doing. SHE IS WRONG! I don't understand it either. I haven't done so well with this but keep acting as if and making those changes that she can see. Either she will get it or she won't. If she brings it up again, I would ask her what she means by you pulling the trigger. You don't have to respond but maybe her saying it out loud will cause her to realize how stupid her reasoning is? Don't know, sometimes that works with people.
M-41 ex-W-40 Together--17 years SS-20 D-14 Bomb--2 Feb 09 WAW--6 Feb 09 Officially divorced on 2 Jun 2010!!! ex-W has a boyfriend 8 Jun 2010!!! Off we go into the wild blue yonder!!!!