Dinner was great! I actually managed to have everything ready at the same time, no small feat for me. And I just wrote a novel on Thinker's thread recapping my sitch and voting for confrontation of cheater. Honestly, after summarizing it for someone new, I cannot imagine still sharing the house with xBF trying to be "friend-ly but not friends." Blech. I know some people make it work, but there is NO WAY I would sit around for years waiting for him to come to his senses. Double blech.

The problem I face in maintaining the "new" or really "pre-xBF" me and not taking responsibility for his actions is that many of you have already chastised me for not being willing to give. Either I'm too rigid or I'm too wimpy. Where is the balance? I don't see it.

Today's update:

Last night I had a little meltdown over whether he was at bowling or not. I called at 8, no answer. Called at 8:50, no answer, left vm. He called back at 9:20 and said he was at dinner with coworkers. I spoke with someone at his office today and they confirmed that he was not at bowling. I definitely need a transparency plan in place to avoid/deal appropriately with these sitchs.

Still no word on what/when meeting on Sunday. Frustrating. If I don't hear anything from him tomorrow I will make other plans for Sunday. If he calls Sun morning I will politely tell him that I thought he forgot since I hadn't heard from him so I made other plans. I do want to reschedule so when are you free?

Received draft of financial settlement tonight via email with no message, just the attachment. First of all, I find that rude. Second of all, there is no supporting documentation for the proposed numbers and they do not sit well with me. I shot back an email asking for documentation but now realize I should have thought through the wording more before sending. I am just so used to dealing with him tersely and without emotion that I don't know how to speak to him any differently.

Perhaps I will explain this to him if I run into him at his office tomorrow. I am having lunch with my friend M who works with him and dropping off cupcakes. I don't think I will go out of my way to find him though.

Last edited by pearlharbr; 04/03/09 06:18 AM.
If you love somebody, set them free.
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