Sorry you're having a rough time Spellfire. It does sound like a very frustrating situation. All I can do is try to think of things I would like xBF to do to put me more at ease. I know it would be helpful to me if he would tell me what he likes/wants when not already engaged in the act. Like just having a sexy conversation by candlelight before the clothes come off. Or just writing a letter or note with some ideas if it's too awkward to talk about at this point.

I know this may be a bit much for a manly man such as yourself \:\) but Oprah recently had a few shows about improving your sex life. You might want to check it out and perhaps your wife would browse through it, although I know she has been resistent to other things. You'll find the info here.

If you love somebody, set them free.
http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g