John: The title of your post really jumped out at me...and I think you have all your answers in how you identified what you're feeling - a phase...Like so many others here, I've gone through that same phase - which for me started, very unexpectedly, after I moved into my own apartment in March. I've since gotten over that feeling of anger - but it took a bit of work - mostly in realizing that the anger wasn't just there because of my STBX - but also because of me...
For me, anger and fear serve as these kind of sign posts that let me know that there's something underlying my responses to things that I haven't yet addressed. Right now, I've got my former landlords basically stealing from me through insane deductions from my security deposit - and while I was briefly angry with the landlord on the phone...I've not had anger at all when thinking about how to deal with it - rather, I've found a calm kind of determination that has made it very easy to put together a case for small claims court...okay...TMI...but I'm just trying to say that anger is informative - and while feeling it is necessary, understanding where it's coming from or what it's obfuscating can help turn that anger into opportunity...for instance, you have a chance to teach your daughter something about how adults who disagree with one another can still interact respectfully.
