Here is your plan to "lovingingly detach." You let her know you understand how you hurt her, that you are taking responsibility for it and that you are working on bettering yourself. Let her know you will support her to do whatever she needs while you are still married. Let her talk, validate and don't get defensive. Your goal is to get back to the friendship stage, talking and spending time together. Your W craves this. .... Lastly - no expectations and expect a pullback if you get close to her.
Coach -- excellent advice. The same advice my DB Coach gave me 3 weeks ago, and it's been the plan I've been following.
This confrontation thing is newly stuck in my head, because it's just getting so blatant and I know that people I know, know (that's a lot of "knows," I know).
So where's the line? Where's the line between being affirmative and lovingly detached and being made a fool of in the eyes of people who know you?
