Stress, WAW and life in general II

[AJM]

UPDATE:
The weekend was interesting. I'm sad to say she still wants to leave. She seems to think that will help somehow although when asked she is not sure how. We had a great time. Lots of conversation, friendly to each other. Caring towards the end of it.

Last night we had sex for the first time in months. Before hand she wanted me to say that I'm going to date her when she moves out and come over for sex. <sigh> As a guy, what do you say to that? As her husband I was devastated, but kept my cool.

This morning she texts me that to have a good morning and thanks for the weekend.

I'm sad, but for the first time she mentioned that she is broken. I see that as progress. I see that as the paramount need. Even if I have to fall on my sword, she needs to heal. I'm hopeful that she will realize we won't be friends if she leaves and that may help to change her mind. She mentioned that she doesn't know what she'll get out of leaving. She's willing to take the risk, she says. She says that she can't let her hair down around me so she needs to leave. She needs to be the one to leave because she now knows I won't.

Anyway, as others have mentioned, believe none of what you hear and half of what you see. It just hurts in some ways to hear her say that. As we were leaving the beach, I asked her if she regretted marrying me (she had mentioned that we got married young and she wants to feel independent and challenged). She said no, and she doesn't regret being married to me either. She asked if I expected that answer? Nope, but was glad to hear it.

I'm hoping that more of the same we've been doing and time will help. But it's hard to keep my feelings in check. I'm still worried about going cold.

Working on it. I've noticed that last night and today she's been much friendlier.

Who knows? I can't change her.

AJ