It sounds like you have a good handle on things. Remember she does feel the guilt. One of the mistakes I would unknowingly make would be to add to it. Until I got hit with a bean pole lol. It wasn't too bad of one though.
Stay upbeat and positive around her, if you need to vent, go off or whatever do it way away from her and the kids. Try your best to show no negativity and keep on getting closer to those kids man, they need you now more than ever.
Stay centered and keep your focus. Like we taked about it's all a part of the back and forth swing. It's a process and she is moving along, it is very slow and has many ups and downs.
Don't loose your patience or perspective.
One day at a time.
Enjoy those kids....speaking of which mine are just about finished eating, so I gotta run.
So I guess this is part of the cycling that we talked about. What is it like she's on some sort of evil merry go round?
Despite her withdrawing from me this weekend, had a great day today. Kids and I went to see Monsters vs. Aliens. Had a blast. I've learned how to loosen up quite a bit.
Finished scraping the bathroom. Ready for paint!! I'm finding myself really enjoying the DIY projects around the house.
My daughter won't go see that movie. I got her a happy meal the other day, it had one of the M vs. A toys in it and she freaked and made me throw it away LOL!!
Sounds like your doing pretty good man. DIY projects are an awesome way to help you along through this crap. If you run out of them. Holler at me, I have some around here to keep you busy.
OK. Came home from work to have my son tell me that my wife stopped at the house with another guy. She told him to keep it a secret from me. He did not feel comfortable doing that so he told me. He also said that he didn't trust her being with that guy.
I called her on it. I stayed very calm and told her that it was unfair to put him in that position. That no matter what is going on between her and I the kids should not get dragged into the middle. She got pissed when I told her about what our son had to say about not trusting the other guy.
She called him later and apologized for doing that to him. She said she didn't realize that it would make him uncomfortable. She told him the guy was an old friend from high school that was helping her move and she should have introduced them.
It was creepy talking to her because it was like talking to a teenager. I know she's reconnected with a lot of her old high school friends over the past few weeks. And she has made mention of how she feels like an insecure 18yo.
You did the right thing by staying calm and calling her on that. If she gets pissed over something like this so be it. You remain calm and strong.
You were not snooping, your son simply stated his concern and you did the right thing. On an emotional level she is a teen. You will see this side of her. It's important not to throw the teenage behavior in her face, it won't do any good, but try and understand that is where she is right now. Clearly not rational and wrapped up in herself.
Now that you called her on that and she apologized to your son, try your best not to bring it up. It's selfish, foolish, and unfair but bringing it up again will make things worse.
Continue to take care of those kids and don't say anything negative to them about her. They need you, be their rock.