And as usual nothing is as it appears. Just rec'd phone call from ritzy hotel in Upstate City where Signore Schmuckatelli happens to live. WAW is booked for 2 nights in mid-July. Plans. People have plans.
But then let's not jump off the cliff and assume the worst. WAW has several friends in Upstate City.
Maybe she is waiting to hear you tell her that it doesn't have to be miserable.
It seems that WAW's only focus on the negative. Yea, yea, yea...all is good when your with the OM or OW. No worries about paying the bills, who is getting the kids from daycare, who is tkaing little johnny to the doctor and so on. But when reality hits, it hits hard.
Maybe she is setting you up? Maybe she is reaching out? WHo knows but you just have to keep DBing.
Seriously, the majority of us are/were here to try to make it work with our spouses, right? And most of us prayed, if you do pray, that "SOME DAY", we would have that day of reconcilitaion with our spouses, right? So what if this it, so what if this is SP's wife taking her baby steps and reaching out to him.
I agree with the the other person that said, it ain't over yet.
I've told her it doesn't have to be miserable. Repeatedly, especially in my pre-DB post-bomb phase.
At MC -- all of this is in my now-famously deleted thread -- when C asked what our goals were, WAW said D and I said "a second marriage -- that just happens to have the same 2 people in it."
I've made the case for renewal, regeneration, and the Third Way between misery-in-marriage and misery-in-divorce.
Per script, it falleth on deafeth eareth, saith the Bard of the Boards.
As the others have pointed out, I don't accept her premise, and neither should you.
A: "All I want you to do is TRY. Considering our shared history together, don't you think we both owe it at least that? I don't want to have any regrets years down the road."
And it will until OM heads for the hills. From the sound of it, July may already be wishful thinking. I suspect he realized that she was serious about divorcing you and going after him, and that was not in his plan. How old did you say Peter Pan is?
People have A's for lots of reasons. Some do it because they are addicted to sex. Some do it because they like the "thrill" of getting away with something that is forbidden. Still others are searching for something outside the marriage that they weren't getting inside it.
While in SPs case, the "Don Juan" seems to be a flighty predator, the OP doesn't always fit that description. Not all their promises are empty, nor all their affection superficial.
Me40 WAW37 M18 T20 S18,14 D13 EA Bomb 6/08 Sep 11/20/08 Ret 08/09 Sep/Filed 11/09
