Something strange happened this past week. You may recall that I received a strange phone call from the XW telling me in a nutshell that she struggles at times....that she thinks about us...etc. I am not really sure what she meant but I did realize how difficult it was for her to make that call. What I did not realize is how that phonecall (which incidentally I have not tried to dissect...ie. I still do not know what she meant and I purposely ended rather quickly) would affect me. Well it has put a litlle anger in me. My interactions (face to face) with XW have been rather cold. I am to blame for this. I can not explain it but I am angry at the waste of time and at her choices...I am still angry (ok angry may be a little strong). So, am I fabricating all this just to enable me to really move on? As I discussed with a friend, is it possible that unless we get mad at our exes and or find someone else, that the WAS lingers in us for way too long. That same friend warned me to not let that call (or more precisely my xw) play with my head. Well evidently it has. Not because I am holding on to the possibility of getting back together...but because these last two years have been a waste. Incidentally due to the fact that there were several excahnges this weekend, D8 noticed that I was cold with her mom. She told me about it last night. I think she really wants me and her mom to get along. Well I failed my daughter this weekend. The least I can do is put my feelings aside when she is around and be normal or act as if. As I write this, I am toying with the idea of writing the XW an e-mail apologizing for my behaviour...although I really have nothing to apologize for. I should be apologizing to my daughter.
