T: 1) BOTH parties are at least accepting of the idea -- that is, come to the decision via independent thinking, not "oh, just please try this for me" and 2) BOTH parties have at least some interest in reconciliation and movement forward.
I am not sure on either of these points. My W is just so D@mn non-communicative when it comes to the R . It is definitely better than fighting all the time or vehemently trying to pull away (as in your sitch), but it means I am left with almost no feedback - just a nagging belief that she is quietly reinforcing her walls and building up to an escape.
To find out the answer to those two questions, I would have to force an R discussion. ... or (probably better) just do nothing for a while and see what happens.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
. It is definitely better than fighting all the time or vehemently trying to pull away (as in your sitch), but it means I am left with almost no feedback - just a nagging belief that she is quietly reinforcing her walls and building up to an escape.
