For an indication as to how far behind you are, if you haven't had it pointed out to you before, look up Smartcookies now infamous post...
Smiley - you're way way way behind...your W is likely way in front of you in terms of thinking...when you can close that gap - you are making some headway.
Closing the gap = real changes in you (and not shouting about it) + creating doubt in her - you wont be able to do anything about the latter - work on the former....
