Thanks everyone for the feedback. I wasn't trying to make anyone else give up, honest....I just see writing on the wall in my situation.
Kalni, how do I feel? Disappointed, sad, and honestly, pissed. I never allow myself to be angry with Dan in front of him, anyway...I try to explain to him how he sees it all wrong, which is pointless so no more cheeseless tunnel.
It really pisses me off that last night he asked, "Why did it take all of this for you to decide to support me and take an active interest in the things that are important to me?"
Where the hell has HE been? I have gone to cattle sales, I have gone to county and state fairs, cow shows, etc etc etc. Yes, I bitched about the money he was spending on the cows but a lot of the complaining is b/c he did it all WITHOUT including me, and I WANTED to be included? My whole life's plan/dream was to be on that farm with him raising our kids and I know I told him that many times. WTF... So I asked him, what about all the times I went to x,y,z or we did x,y,z.....He replied "Guess I just don't look at it that way"
I really want to just tell him to F off. I am just so frustrated that it is ending over his perception that I wasn't interested in being a part of it when on the contrary he shut me out and then complained that i wasn't there..........
He missed church again this morning, called and said he had just woken up at 9:50, church is at 10:15. Then texted me after church, "Were do you and the kids want to go for lunch?" Why does he keep inviting me to do things? Grr..
I told him I was planning to just make sandwiches, chips, pudding at home. He said that would be great and he would be right over. Then he was telling me all about how one calf was born this morning and another was on its way... (Didn't he say he thought I didn't care? So why give me the details if you think I don't want to be involved?)
So he just left w/the kids they are going out to see the new calf get born, He invited me out too I said I would come in a bit in my own car. I do want to see the calf but I am not going to keep doing this group stuff when he says I don't care about his hobbies/interests/goals. How can I be there to watch a cow get born but yet I am not interested...grr
I miss Woog and Mike. They could go kick H's butt for me...
