Thanks for the responses. I appreciate the direct feedback without any sugar coating. I agree it probably will get worse before it gets better. Also agree there's probably more going on with the OW than it seems, maybe even a PA, but since I don't have any direct evidence of an affair and he's already left me, I guess there's not much I can do. My MF that works with H told me yesterday the rest of the guys at work are very uncomfortable with the OW and H talking so much, and think H is stupid for leaving me. That was nice to hear.
I appreciate the ideas for taking care of myself and giving serious thought to R and what boundaries I need to set in place.
I screwed up last night and went to see my H's dad. He confirmed H is probably in a MLC and said H doesn't feel his age and I'm acting mine. Stupid of me to talk to the FIL I know, but at least I'm angry today instead of feeling like a doormat. I won't talk to FIL about H again - realize that's not helpful or apppropriate. H is acting childish, but to Sandi's point, maybe I have treated him more like a kid than my partner. Something to think about while I'm alone.
? - how should I handle the detaching, when we have to work out bills/finances. Okay to send email or text and just keep it factual without any ILY's, etc? H is not open to seeing a C at all.
