I hear and feel your pain cag. I don't think I've talked to you, but I've seen you on other people's threads. It is so hard. I was with h since I was 18 and now I'm 32. It's dam* HARD to have that person cut out of your life all of the sudden. Even with the problems going on, that was the person you reached for when you needed help or to tell someone something. The hardest habit to break is reaching for the phone to dial him every time something happens that you want to tell.
Stay strong, enjoy your kids, and lean on your friends when you need to. That's what I'm trying to do. Not that it works that well for me all of the time right now...lol but I'm trying.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
