Hey Naej. No the flat was always 'my' project anyway, so no great shakes to sell it, but I am doing so at a loss, so adding to that debt mountain unfortunately And yes, fake it till you make it!

Hey BND, thanks for posting! Thanks for the comments on OW, I thikn you are right.. and do I want him back? Yes, sadly, the universe feels 'wrong' that we are not together. I just saw his oldest BMF's W tonight, she actually said that we were like "hinge and bracket" (a UK double act) and that she would love us to get back together. Everyone I know feels this way, his friends, my friends, family etc. So yep, I do.

So.. saw exMIL today.. was hard, but I am glad I did. I took her flowers, she gave me tea and cake and we nattered for an hour and a half and it was fine. We didnt really mention him, except to say she hasnt seen him since Xmas (yay, he hasnt been back home with her ! So in fact, he's only been home once with her since he started seeing her in August I now know!). One good thing is, she kept going on and on about how good I looked, how healthy, how in fact, she'd never seen me look so good in all the years she's known me !! So.. hopefully that will get back to him!