My situation #9

[steady]

Journalling:

Yesterday my W slept over her mom's house with the kids as usual. I went to the movies with my brother and his son. I stayed at his place for a while then came back home to sleep. My W took the kids straight to her brother's house this morning for a birthday party for my D. I piddled around the house and then left around 2 to go relax at the waterfront. I had a IC session at 4 so I just sat on a bench watching people and read a bit.

After my C session my W had left a message on my phone about picking up a present she wanted to get for our D. So I picked it up and went home. Then I went out food shopping. Came home and put my D to bed. So here I am....lol.

Yesterday afternoon my W called me on the phone to tell me my idea about the time for visitation made more sense than the one she presented. She said she had so much going through her mind that she wanted to call and tell me before she forgot.

So that's just some journalling.

I thought my IC session was at 4pm but it was 3:30 so I only got about 15 or so minutes with her. She didn't charge me and we made an appt for Thursday night. I went over some of the stuff that happened this week and she asked me why I felt the need to answer to my W. I said I realized this and decided not to get my buttons pushed anymore. I told her I'm done arguing with my W about stupid stuff and stuff that's happened in the past - is just a total waste of energy.

I told her it felt good to get that stuff off my chest (referring to the conversation I had with my W earlier in the week) and that it was stuff that I have been keeping inside me. I also said I said, it's done, now I don't need to bring it up again.

Overall I'm doing alright. Keep seeing sides of my W that I don't like so that's definitely helping with the detachment. My C again said I'm seeing her true nature. Then I added, as long as I was doing what she wanted, when she wanted, everything was fine. (thorughout our whole relationship). But as soon as I wasn't doing that, this is how she would act. It's been going on for so long that I totally couldn't even see it until I've stepped back a bit.

The C said it's unfortunate that my W is like this, but it is how she is. I agreed.

She also asked me what I was doing to move forward. I told her the only thing I feel I can work on right now is detaching - and that's what I've been doing.