So I'm kinda happier right now cause I think I made a gain today, but I still realize that the feelings for me are still not there.
I have come to believe that we wait for feelings to come....we make decisions based on feelings (very important decisions at times) and think too much about feelings. So, for now, I would suggest that you stop worrying about what you feel or don't feel toward your W and just do what you know is the right thing to do in order to try to salvage your M.
When I was wanting to walk out on my M of many years, I honestly thought I would never feel any stronger love for my H than I did a brother. However, it is b/c of all the mess you are put through when in all the pain of the R and trying to make decisions and trying to decide what is best and what you really want b/c you get to the place.....after a while....that you aren't sure about anything. At least, that happens if you are putting too much stock into "feelings".
I hope that you two will go in August and that both of you can make a turn around in your lives. But, even after that trip, it still takes work on part sides. It will always take work if you stay together.
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
