I've moved here from MLC

[stillloveshim]

I know! He's a gem, but I am pretty sure we can share him!
How are things going for you?

[stillloveshim]

I used to work with H before S was born and I still have a lot of really good friends who work there and wanted to kill H when they saw him flirting with ex-OW.
But a couple of them have informed me that over the last month things have taken a nose dive between the two of them and their interaction. And recently, one of my friends said "And it's him. He's the one giving the cold shoulder." So not sure what that is about or why EXACTLY, but I think I have some pretty educated guesses.
I called him last night because I told him I would so S could say good night. I called around 8:45 or 9:00. He was already asleep so I let him go back to bed and not talk to S because it's hard to tell how long S will want to be on the phone. If you take it away from him and he's not done, holy crap, so help you.

I am not sure what to expect later from him. I pick S up after work and we trade off at my Girlfriend/Roommates place around 6:30 so I will definitely see him.

But the rain has changed EVERYONE's plans quite a bit.

I have two scenarios that I'm bracing for:

He could be stand-offish again because he's going to be very busy at work again today AND even worse, no golf because we're getting lots and lots of rain! And he's not happy about the lack of golf in his life.

Or

He will be very affectionate and want to hang out because it's his weekend with S and he maybe trying to butter me up to help him with S and to ML.

So, it's tricky. G/R said the other day "Figure out what it is you want to do on your weekend off and do it." I said "I want to spend it with H and S!" She said "Yeah, I know. But I'm not going to let you, so figure it out. Figure out some you time."

So what I'm thinking is that I'm more expecting scenario 2. My game plan at this point. I thought for tonight I would go to dinner with him and S if he asks. But I'm not much sure after that. I guess I'll play it by ear.

Once again any suggestions are welcome.

[AJM]

Listen to your G/R. She's right. What are YOU going to do? Since you know what you want to do, what is your secondary desire?

I know secretly you want to hang out with us here. But really, what is it you really want to do this weekend besides your number one choice?

AJ

[Thinker]

Get out of your comfort zone and away from your routine. Go for a hike. Go to the beach (I wish I could go to the beach - you live in Florida )

Just get in your car and go do something different.

[stillloveshim]

Unfortunately, the weather is terrible here, hence the literal washing away of my plans.
I guess what I wanted, in my perfect world, H would ask me to hang out tonight and possibly ML. Then tomorrow, H would call and see if I want to hang out again, but this time I would be out of area, until late in the evening, like oh, 9:00 or 9:30, which is after S goes nite nite. And if he wanted to see me then, that's cool. And on Sunday, I'm having a me me me day. Pedi/mani, tanning and whatever else my heart desires. Maybe some shopping. Who knows? But a me day for sure and then I would see H at dinner where I'm staying, which we do every Sunday and just look happy and relaxed.

Then a repeat the next weekend, when H has S again.

I don't know, I feel like H maybe liking the situation as it is. That's why I really need him to SEE really SEE how hard it is to be with an almost 3 year old for more than 48 hours, alone.

[2gthrButApart]

I hope you have a great weekend, be strong. Make a lil' button that says What would AJ do? LOL. Might help. The things you're doing on sunday I'm going to spread out throughout my wk LOL. My H is going to come back from his trip and wonder WTH happened to me. You do the same, go get glamoured up. Maybe you should go tomorrow instead of sunday. Keep your mind off of things.

[AJM]

ST, how goes it? Hopefully you're enjoying your weekend and RELAXING?

AJ

[stillloveshim]

Hi
Here's my weekend basically in a nutshell.

So not really sure what to think, but what's new?
It was H's weekend with S.
He came over to where I'm staying on Friday. He made us dinner. He was very nice to affectionate. After dinner, he asks "Hey do you want to watch S while I go to a restaurant/bar with NCAA package to hang out with a friend for a bit? And you can meet me at home later?" I said no and he took it very well.
A few minutes later we were talking about going out of town. (We are horrible but yes, we love to gamble and I think a planned trip would do us some good.) I have a little side job that's going to pay a little bit, so excited about that and plan to treat myself with that money no matter what. I was telling him about that and I didn't tell him what it entailed. He kept asking me and I kept telling him not to worry about it.
As he's leaving WITH S later, he says "Are you coming over later or do you have plans?" I told him I would come over.
So on Saturday, he invited me over for dinner. I said "I might make it over there. I'll let you know." I did not go over for dinner. Ate with friends, went and grabbed a drink with another friend and then went over to the place where I pay half the mortgage.
Sunday H had his online fantasy baseball draft and I did not help him with S nor did I offer nor did he ask me too. I went to watch college men's tennis team get their butts kicked by number one tennis team in the nation and now have a sun burned nose and part of my chest. I look stupid.
H came over for dinner. When he got there, it was just us. H was in a blah mood and I wanted to say "What's your problem?" But I ignored it and was just happy to be on the couch reading on a Sunday.
Later, man of the house gets there. He and H start drinking and cooking together.
I go up stairs to do a few things and come back down after I hear lady of the house get home. But now things have changed while I was upstairs--and for not that long mind you. Now H's grabbing me. And I mean lots of hugging and snuggles and all of it. What's more, he's doing it in front of our friends, plain site.

But I stayed at home last night too. Three nights in a row. Actually a big step. Sunday night, we just snuggled, no attempts to hook up, just sleep.
However, not getting my hopes up. He does this crap, like he wants to work on things and then we take a SERIOUS turn in the opposite direction.

He did fix my watches this weekend which was very nice of him. I feel lost with out my watch, and both of them died within days of each other which makes sense.

H has S again next weekend because he need me to cover two weekends in a row for him, so we're getting back on track now.
My girlfriend wants to go out of town for a day shopping trip. I may do that, but I also need to save the money. I can think of all kinds of things that I want, but nothing that I need.
But that's the latest in my life.

All insight is appreciated.

And oh, not one call or any form of contact from H today.

[Thinker]

Sorry about the rollercoaster. I agree that, although your sitch in general is pretty good and promising, the high level of contact with your H makes the back and forth roller coaster painful.

Keep the focus on yourself.

[2gthrButApart]

Ugh, SLH, I know how you feel. I don't like to get my hopes up either. We have to "Act As If" but what does that really mean? Act as if things will be great, or Act as if he still wants a D, and is leading us on. I love the affection too, but then it leads to more confusion...so then I wonder is the affection good or just making my mind games worse?

Keep up on the track you're going, you're doing really well. Just expect that there will be some type of backlash in the next few days, if it comes you won't be surprised, but if it doesn't then better for you.

I've been expecting one for 2 months, and there hasn't really been one yet. A few "very close calls", where there could have been an argument, but I never let it escalate, but no big backlash, or D talk since 1/15/09. Hope I'm not jinxing it LOL.

Keep up the GALing, you're doing awesome!! Maybe you should join your friend on the shopping trip, not to buy anything, but just so you're definitely unavailable if he asks you to come over.