She's trying hard to get away again. Seems to be a pattern. Get close, run away. Put "things" between us. I can only take that to mean progress.
Good news: she's reaching to my daughter trying to connect. That's really good news. I'll be out tonight, so she'll have plenty of time to reconnect with them today at least.
Yesterday she came home tired. Exhausted. Then tried to stay up talking to friends on the phone (extra loud - hmm...) and then tried to get the kids to watch tv with her. She "fidgeted" a bit trying to get them to come away from me and into the living room. Somehow, I think she got her feelings hurt that they did not go. My Daughter and I had a great conversation last night about world history and world politics. Interesting with a 13 almost 14 year old and to hear her perspective on things.
I made cookies last night. Left many of them with a note for WAS to take with her to school to give away. She didn't. Oh well, I guess we have a tremendous amount of cookies to eat
She's been ignoring my txts and notes and such. I say ignoring. Not really. I think she hears them ringing in her head but doesn't want to respond. Part of that distancing herself. Bracing is the word that comes to the back of my mind.
I think she's feeling things that she's not sure of. Starting to bring up feelings she's buried for a while. Good sign. I'm happy she's showing signs of healing herself.
I am still happy with that bit even if it means she continues to walk the rest of the way away. She deserves to heal.
I'll be out with an old friend tonight. Beer and bullets. Not in that order, but it should be fun just the same. Tomorrow is a day of doing things around the house mostly. WAS "informed" me that she'll be driving separate cars to son's hockey game 'cuase then she's going out with her GF's from there. Then wants to leave for the night away on Sunday early afternoon.
And the beat goes on....
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
