Okay, so the saga continues. I'm no longer trying to DB
That is a decision that only YOU can make. A question though..IF you are not trying to DB anymore, then what exactly are you trying to do ? DB'ing is so decieving, cause it really isn't about saving your marriage, it is about saving yourself.
From what I see....Trapt has been trying to get you to read all you can about this, and to understand this plight from YOUR perspective. It doesn't make it much easier for the day to day stuff, except that you will be better equipped to deal with these interactions. What you are seeing is nothing new to anyone here, and the things you are hearing from him is nothing that we all haven't heard at one point.
Please understand that this is HIS path to walk, but you also get to find YOURSELF through this. I'm assuming that you are not perfect, cause no one person is, so what are some of the things that YOU can do for you ? Changes in the kind of person that YOU want to be ?
If you truly are done with this....answer ONE question for me please.. Are you going to be able to look your children in the eye one day and tell them that YOU did everything that YOU could do to give them a happy family environment through their childhood ? Cause I'm thinkin at this point ? Without actually DOING the work ? Your answer would be no.....
It would be fairly easy to say that you came to a website that promoted saving your marriage, play around a little, NOT do any work, and then say that it was a scam and it didn't work, I'm sure the kids will understand that one day.
SoCo, you are here, with some of the best DB'ers trying to help you along. Why not take advantage of that and really DO the work to save yourself. The resources are readily available to you. Take advantage of that....use that to educate yourself on what is REALLY going on in his head before you jump on the I'm done wagon.
As far as the interaction on the phone last night? You handled what you allowed yourself to be sucked in to well. Although you still ALLOWED yourself to be sucked into that. And you gave her too much value in this for you. You spent the evening with him ( as well as the computer complaining about spending that time with him ), you didn't want to, had an interaction where you set boundries to him, and STILL felt that you had to answer the phone when he called you after he left.
Peace SoCo.......I hope you find it within yourself....
