Standing on the Edge

[native]

I just found out that W is facing some serious problems. Apparantly her depression is worsening. I don't know if this is related to her money problems, unresolved guilt/anger,living too long on her emotions, or just a result of general spiritual malaise and lack of faith, forgiveness.

She seems hard=wired for emotional disaster to me.

Anyway, she is unable to make ends meet and is considering selling her new car or getting out of her apt. Gas bill is too high ( told her to get on the equal payment plan, but I doubt she will even pursue it).

She was using our Sam's account for food and gas, not able to pay herself, and ran it to the limit. She thought erroneously that I had disabled her card. When we talked about it (I knew she was doing it, we had talked briefly about it b4), she felt pretty bad about essentially taking advantage of me.

At this point however, that doesn't matter to me.

Since depression can kill and her's is getting worse, I am concerned.

Her counsellor wants her to take a month-long medical leave of absense and to change her medications. But she can't afford to do that. Even if she could, she would not be able to relax and recuperate, which she needs to do.

In any case, I told her I would be praying for her and offered hugs if she needed it....(she needs hugs...)

Her text response: ' Thnks. I appreciate that. :)'

I also offered her a sympathetic ear and dinner, so she is going to go out to eat with me tonight.

I'll report back later.

I'm afraid that the chickens are coming home to roost for her.

I presume this latest development is the accumulation of all her bad financial and emotional choices weighing on her. But only she, God and perhaps her counselor knows for sure.

What I hope will become clear is that I am not the source and cause of all her problems, especially the worsening depression.