Umm I'm trying to escape and keep myself from saying/doing things that I should not say/do and I know in my head I should not say/do. Just needed to gather my emotions for a few minutes. Want to cry.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
I know it's hard but it beats giving your son's eyes another reason to bulge out tonight. It also beats giving the the OK (other kid - the 19 yo one) any satisfaction. It also beats a backslide from hell and though I know it would feel good just to blow for a few short minutes the aftermath ain't worth it. Take the high road. It'll be over soon.
Then you can think about whether or not you're going to let him come back into your house and eat your food again while disrespecting you like that right in front of your son...
SoConfused....I have been reading here....listen to Jack and AMYC...they know what they are talking about.. I love to get on and read what AMY has to say...she is so matter of fact and right on...all the time..
My H does that all the time, with his phone that is....in the beginning of all this, I'm sure he did it to set me off...and it worked...I would blow every time...now I just go about my thing and act like I don't even see him texting her...she's trash to me..and trash eventually has to be taken to the curb....
Now, if I ever heard him say, I love you to her in front of me..I think I probably would flip....big backslide but WOW....that would be hard to swallow...
Take Care....Treese
Treese
H 49 M 45 D 23, D17, S12 M 25 T 31 01/07 OW H at my door w/proof Bomb ILYBINILWY 06/07 Sep 01/08 headed for the greener grass, Mar08.B#2H has child who is 9 11/08 pos.paternity
Problems as trite as this sounds are to be overcome, and in doing so makes a person better or builds character...sometimes problems crush people and instead of character that person builds up excuses.
I apologize for that post. I did it off of one in my stuff. Didn't see all your posts and did not realize what you were working through. I sincerely apologize!
Hey SC, I am sorry you had to deal with that tonight. I am sorry your h is being an a##. Do not give them the satisfaction of seeing you lose it. You can do this.
Wow. That has really got to be one of the most painful things I can remember experiencing. Child birth does not hold a candle.
Alien or not, this is the man I have been married to since I was 20 years old. Ouch.
So, I did what you all said. I did comment on it and tell him not to come into my house and disrespect me like that again. Not in front of the kids though of course. I don't put my baggage in front of them. I had my little say,( before I "talked" to all of you guys) then he watched tv with the kids and I just went outside and sat on the patio with the dog to take a few minutes to gather myself.
We ate dinner, then the kids wanted to ride bikes to the park. So we got the dog and went off on a little walk to the park. I was not in a good state of mind on the walk. We got to the park and there's this big hill that I always race the kids up, so I thought what the hell, I'm going to have fun and not let this a hole make me act any different. I raced my son up the hill and left the a hole in the dust stupefied. He thought I would be pissy and broken up I guess the whole night.
We then all ran around and played an exhausting game of freeze tag until it was about to get dark. It was really fun. I did not let him see that he had upset me. After a while he started chasing me and trying to get close. He almost tried to kiss me a couple of times. Old habits die hard I guess. I thought that was interesting. If one is in "love" that shouldn't be happening.
We got back to the house and started watching a movie with the kids. I then went in the kitchen to do the dishes. I was acting like I was in a good mood. Okay... now here comes the really bizarre part. He comes in the kitchen with me and gives me a big hug. He says I'm sorry. I am so sorry for everything. He is on the verge of tears. I do not let myself get too emotional. He says I love you. I don't argue, what's the point? I say you know that I love you too, we have been married for 12 years. However, I have boundaries and your behavior right now is totally unacceptable to me. He says I am so lost and confused right now. Will you ever be able to forgive me for what I have done? I told him that there are some things I can forgive, but I do have boundaries and he has crossed them tonight. He says he understands, and that he does love me. He says that he is amazed by me...???... I guess my attitude???
Let me tell you, my attitude was all fake people. Fake it til ya make it. Wow. Strange stuff here folks.
Anyone care to analyze??
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
