WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 5

[AnotherNightmare]

She wound up calling at lunch to see if we needed anything (porabably more for our son than me)

This is an example where positive self-talk would help you get a more heart and mind towards her. Maybe she did do it also for you. Just something to think about...

I'm ok with her leaving but she wants to take the kids. I'm not ok with that. How do I show compassion in that case?

I think here you have to show compassion for your kids. Given the circumstances and her decision to leave, what is best for them, not her? Also, there is going to be a custody agreement soon. You need to hold her to that. I would definitely insist on a close to 50/50 agreement.