No, I am not trying to mold him to be something I want him to be. I know him better than anyone and accept all his goods and bads!
I am trying to UNDERSTAND him...I know I know.. thats impossible!
I have decided to really let go. As much as I love this person, if he doesnt love me as much as I love him..whats the point. Love is not supposed to hurt, its suppossed to feel good.
I sat last night and watched a silly video we made on my phone driving in the car as a joke to a friend. I laughed and laughed.. thats the crazy fun loving guy I married. Nothing forced, we were comfortable as a family..(the kids were in the back seat laughing too)
Its a memory of a great day we had together..one of our last.
The one thing that stresses me out is our money. He has left and I have ALL the bills coming.
He hasnt said how much he will give me. We are not going to pay our mortgage anymore... I will live here until I get kicked out. How humiliating...20 years of hard work down the drain! Anyone have any experience with the current forclosure process?
We will not be able to afford two seperate lifestyles again. We did last year and probably got another 7K in the hole. Time to throw in the towel.
I would like to apply as much cash to credit bills as possible to help after the divorce. Hubby will get the majority of our bills and with child support he wont have much. I want to help eliminate as many as possible but he wont talk to me...STRESS!
I hope he will soon..this is the only opportunity we will have to put a couple grand per month on them.
Hubby says I deserve better than him... I know I deserve better than this crappy situation..but I also know he is a better man inside... I tried to help and bring that person back out.I couldnt.
Its kinda funny... the OW has only brough tragedy to our life. She was a close friend of mine, we met at work.. I got demoted from a management position... all in part due to my friendship with her. There is alot involved..too much to write, but if I had never befriended her..would have never happened.
She is like a black widow spider... I learned a valuable lesson and had to hit rock bottom. How different things would be if I didnt befriend her. I feel that way with Hubby. He has made decisions for her...someday he will regret it.
Im in a better place today..cuz I know this is out of my control..and I will continue living with my kids!
They are doing...OK...thats it. At least one of them cries on a daily basis. Ususally my 10y/o. Often my 3 y/o wants to know where daddy is...
My oldest is an intravert..keeps everything inside. I have her going to youth group on Wednesdays.. she loves it. Some of the things she say, she is wise beyond her years.
