1) Don't sell your house if you don't want to, or aren't ready to (either financially or emotionally). That's a huge financial decision, and you get to have a say in it. Don't be bullied here.
2) RE: your date this weekend. It's certainly your call, but I wouldn't want to go on a date with someone who is, we can reasonably assume, cheating on me, won't talk to me, accuses me, and tries to bully me. Don't be whiny or pouty about it -- just make plans to do something with some male friends, and do it.
3) RE: her accusing you of having an affair. While this is entirely SCRIPT, I don't think you should leave it hanging in the air, unaddressed. I would answer her on this -- JUST ONCE -- saying something like "I would never do that; I take our marriage vows very seriously. I don't know what you've done, because you won't tell me, but please stop accusing ME of doing something just because you're feeling guilty about something. Now don't bring this up ever again."
4) RE: "control." Yes, she probably is. A huge part of her life (her marriage and her own moral code) is OUT of control right now, so she's probably trying to exert control in the other areas of her life where she feels she can. Again -- don't be bullied in these areas.
I think your plan for the next four days should be one of pulling back. Do NOT keep asking her to tell you what she's done. Don't initiate any talks in this regard, but if it comes up in CONTEXT, then just say something like "You know I want to know what you've done, and you also know that I said I could forgive you, but I'm not going to keep begging you to tell me. When you're ready, I know you will, but for now I've got some of my own things I want to work on and accomplish." (and if she asks you what those are, tell her "They are are personal.")
