I'm really glad to hear that you want to take it slow. Do you think your wife would agree to enter into a no-contact/transparency plan with you? Without it, she's going to be VERY succeptable to a relapse.
Puppy
Puppy...I think she understands from the last time that we reconciled. Last April, she moved out for three weeks. She came back begging to come home and asked what she needed to do. I told her full and open disclosure on her cell phone,email, etc. No contact with OM. Counseling for herself. Church for all of us. At the point that she was better individually; then we could start MC. However, my fault was that I never included any part of what I needed to do. That was before I found DB.
Anyway, she agreed then. She's much more even-keeled emotionally right now than she was back then; so if she's serious, I suspect that she'll be accepting as long as it doesn't feel like a full-bore surveillance from me. How do I do that? At this point, I don't know.
Looking back at the last 6 months; this whole DB process seems easy compared to what I'm looking at right now. The "whole" piecing process isn't covered very well in Michelle's books. I now feel like I'm starting the hard work.
I've been thinking all day about how to approach this part of the sitch. I'm going to have to outline what I need in this and lay some groundrules/boundaries in this "dating" phase. Because, I ain't sharing. If she's dating me; I don't want her to be dating someone else. Otherwise it's not worth my time. I'd rather be divorced and dating different people. She's still my W and if she's trying to re-commit to the marriage; I don't want to share.
I need to get a hold of Coach. This sitch is heading in a direction in which I'm a novice.
