Need Help handling affair thats still going on

[kjensen]

Thanks Jack! Today started out OK-I was trying to be upbeat. Had another DB telephone counseling session-planning on focusing on me, distancing for next 3 weeks a bit-not being so available, staying positive around H. Sounds very challenging when I write it out! This afternoon, H started talking about money, how our budget would change if he was gone..got me emotional. It started as a disussion to make me feel better about being able to support myself and keep the house-I know he means well, but the discussion "vibe" changed and he said he had opinions about how I was spending money, but that he would keep thoe opinions to himself for now.. He sees it as we had a fight about money today(which is something we rarely ever did before) and I see it as a discussion that got emotional(because I didn't want to have it or think about him leaving me). So he left and I just felt like today was something he will count against me- I feel(and this is probably wrong) that he keeps track of the positives and negatives-like there is a tally going on constantly. Any gestures I make for closeness aren't reciprocated, so I think distancing is a good idea. I'm still foused mentally on the OW and feeling threatened, although I don't think he's seen her since 3/22(because she has her kids this week). Just not feeling so positive today. I hope to start tomorrow fresh-we should get some snow!