Its been years since I have been on here. I tried the busting but in the end she just didnt want me and kept having affairs. UNfortunately after the last sep we thought we would make it work. That lasted 4 months and she left. Ends up she had a co worker she was seeing the whole time. I was left with the house and debt while she split and rented a fancy townhome. Its now 2 years later and she just got evicted. Her bartending income could not support the life she borrowed. After a close call on losing the house my brother moved in and has been here since last summer. NOw back to the EX. She had no where to go and our daughter expected me to help her mother. I gave 2 weeks tops before she would have to leave. Its been 5 days and my heart is killing me. All I can think about is the other men and how I was rejected. In fact I have become this father figure because sure enough she is seeing a married man..again! I dont want our D to find out because it would crush her faith in her mother. Instead I tried to talk to my EX about it and explain how belittling it is to herself. No one deserves second fiddle but she is in love and not listening to me. I dont know what mentally damaged her so long ago to think being with married men is the right thing for her. It actually breaks my heart even more. I loved her so much and still do love her but she never got that. I cant go back I know because the damage is done. My mental images will never go away. Shes dirty. Still I just wish she knew how good of a woman I thought of her. Maybe she does but doesnt care. I dont have any questions for anyone here today. I just need to let it out. None of my friends understand and just think I am a sucker or to nice etc. I feel I had no choice but to help her and now I am so broken inside. Somedays I wish my life was over so the pain would stop. Im not going to do anything either. I couldnt leave my D. It just hurts soooo damn much.
