My situation #9

[steady]

Yesterday afternoon my W called me and said she wanted to go to her SIL's house. She said her SIL's friend was going to be there and she's D. My W said she was having a hard time and said it was helpful to talk to women who have been through it. She asked if I would watch the kids so she could go. I told her no problem.

So I picked up the kids and we ate dinner at my brother's house. I took them home and was giving them a shower (once in a while they like to play in the shower instead of a bath) and she called me. I told her I had them in the shower and asked if I could call her back. She said, "I'm going to spend the night here and then come home and change then go to work." I got silent and was thinking. Then she said, "Hello?" I told her I was thinking.

Then I said I thought it was disrespectful and irresponsible for her to call me at 7pm and tell me this. I said I have to be at work at 7am and I can't take the kids to school. In order for me to do that I have to clear it with my boss before hand. She then said, "Can't you go to work at 7:30?" I told her no - my day starts at 7. I said I didn't think she would be happy with me if I did this to her. She then said, "I already told you I was thinking about staying at my mom's a couple days this week." And I said, yeah but we didn't discuss it and plan it.

She got short with me and we got off the phone. I put the kids to bed and was watching TV when the phone rang about 9:45. It was my W and she told me she was on her way home. She said she was tired and she never gets good rest sleeping over other people's houses.

When she got home she came upstairs and told me, "You were right. I shouldn't have asked you about tommorrow morning." And that was it. Then she got ready for bed and went into her room.

I was pissed off because of the way she presented it on the phone. At least in the afternoon she asked me if it was ok for her to go to her SIL's and if I could watch the kids. When she called to stay over she was telling me what she was doing instead of asking me if it was ok. As long as we're together she has to still answer to me and I to her. This telling me what she's going to do doesn't fly with me.

Anyway I got over it before she was even coming home. She has turned it a completely selfish person.