Just curious: is your H ticked because you GOT the dog, or because you got the dog without talking to him about it first? Truth in advertising I've been dealing with a similar issue over a pair of cats that my wife got. The issue is not that they are destructive -- which they are -- and irritating as all get-out (although I can generally keep my thoughts of "getting a new tennis racket" to myself). The problem, which I suppose some might call a power struggle, is that she got them within a few weeks of a long discussion we'd had in which she very explicitly, specifically and emphatically promised that she would NOT get any more cats (she wanted to help a local rescue group that shelters kittens).
So, what I have now is a pair of permanent black reminders that despite the fact that she knew what my feelings were, validated those feelings, and strongly committed not to do anything contrary to them...went right out and did it anyway. I know I'll probably get back a chorus of "Get over it...do you want to be right or happy?" To be honest, I want to be both, which in know isn't practical. As a fallback, it'd be a lot easier to get over if she'd acknowledge how betrayed I feel by this, but she won't do that either. To her it's a non-issue. So I'm working through it, but it isn't easy -- especially when I go to sit down on what used to be a perfectly good couch before "Thing 1 and Thing 2" shredded it sharpening their claws!
Whew...was that a vent or what? Sorry. Anyway, I guess my point is, is adding a pet to the family (a major undertaking) something that is understood by both of you to be a unilateral decision, or a mutual one? And is that what he's really upset with? Just a thought.
HERE is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin...sometimes he feels that there really is another way [of coming downstairs], if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it.
