Walk Away German Wife (WAGW)

[PortlandDad]

More journalling:

W sent me an e-mail today. She asked me if I had taken care of her visa bill for her. I replied that I had not because she had told me that she was going to see if she could pay it from Germany. She called me a couple of minutes later and we got into it, right at my desk at work... holy hold-on-to-your-backslides batman!

first she accused me of holding on to her bill to deliberately make it late. I told her that I sent it the very next day that it arrived. She asked my then was the letter post marked 3/17/09, but the bill due 4/3/09... *boggle* I said, "because in the US, we use the mon/day/year format". Unbelievable. She's lived her for 18 years and she forgot that... she thought the bill was past due for 4 Mar 09.

She gets over her embarrassment quickly, though. Like a ninja, she is back on the offense. She asks me if I can front her the money. I tell her nope, that she doesn't have enough credit with Sugar Daddy. She starts pitching a fit that she can get the money, but it will take some time to send it, blah blah blah. I told her that I would be happy to pay the bill, once I have the money in my hands. Then I asked her what the payout amount on the visa bill was, and she tells me it's $3000! She hasn't learned anything...

So then she says that she doesn't want to send me the power-of-attorney so I can sell the house, because I could then sell it to my sister for $1 and cheat her out of her money(?!) I asked her which of her "friends" suggested that I would do that... she dodged.

I tell her that the POA was a convenience for her since she wouldn't have to get involved in signing the contract with the realtor, handling the offers and counter-offers, and doing the closing paperwork, but if she wanted to be involved, that she could pay to have the papers faxed, translated, notarized and faxed back on every thing. She backed down and said that she would send the POA.

Then I said, if she was so worried about the translation cost of a single document, how was she going to cope with the 80+ pages of our divorce paperwork. She acts offended, "Oh! So you are jumping to a divorce already! So quickly?" I ask her where she sees this R going. She is in school in Germany, getting her german driver license, working on restoring her german citizenship, living her fantasy life; me and the kids are here, not going anywhere for a long time. What am I except the fall-back plan, the consolation prize, the 2nd choice. I am not going play that role for her.

I tell her the kids deserve better than what she is giving them. I told her I regretted giving her the money that enabled her fantasy life. I told her that her chance at reconciling with me was running out and that she would need to decide. She said that she had thought about coming home, but how could she now?

Unfortunately I had to go, but I told her that only she could make the decision that she was facing, but there were 5 people that would have to live with the results of it.

Felt good to stand up to her, but I know that I crushed some parts of her that thought she was doing ok. Ah well, she'll talk to the OM tomorrow and all will be forgotten.