3.5 years and I am still in the same f'ing spot. Is this where I finally grieve this? I feel sick to my stomach and just want to run away!
Simplicity at it's finest. Yes, it is the time when you finally grieve this, allthough I believe you already have to a point.
Running away is not necessary, you are right where you belong. You will continue to be an independent woman and a mother. You need to remember that your life has moved on. Because you did not start dating others or fall in love does not mean that you have not moved forward with your life. Many people end relationships and take a very long time to find another one, it does not for one minute mean that they have been stagnant for that entire time.
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What is the point for him to explain what I read? Again, he owed me nothing.
Let me tell you one thing, he owed you honesty. A man who ends a marriage and then begins the journey back must be held accountable for his behaviors. After all he knows the hurt and damage that was caused by the same behaviors so long ago. What he doesn't owe you is commitment, he hasn't done that. However honesty is owed. It is the same with any relationship and you know that. If your son was in high school and began dating his first girlfriend you would teach him to always be honest with her. To never try and deceive someone he is involved with right? It is no different for your ex husband, except that after what he has been through he should no better, shame on him.
You will be sad and hurt for a bit, knocked down from the clouds for a short time, but in the end you and I both know you will soar again and move on. You deserve better than what you have received.
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I have also read your threads, but never felt comfortable jumping in your well-established group.
Never ever hesitate to post to me. I do not believe that anyones words around here fall on deaf ears. I cannot tell you how many times it has been a random poster that has brought the most clarity to me, and not for nothing, but how long has it been since I posted on one of your threads? What if I had decided not to share my views with you?
