Diane, actually DQ and others have used that ND term before. I have been following your postings and I so sorry for you having to deal with ND in your spouse. I know you must feel so lonely in your decision about what to do next. ((( Diane ))) I still pray for you daily.

Many years ago in an argument with Mrs. Cinco over our lack of sex she said something like, "You want more Cinco and I want less, I'm just not that into it."

I answered with, "Well if you are wanting less then we can't go any lower than ZERO. You are asking to give up sex all together... which I won't do."

Recently Mrs. Cinco has told me she cannot give me what I am wanting: Passion, Affection, Desire and Intimacy. I am asking her to join me and explore herself in ways that she has no interest in doing. After all these years I still have no idea about how she prefers to be touched. She won't tell me. I think this is because she has no idea about what she likes or wants, she just doesn't think about it.

I have some idea about what works for her but not because she told me so, just in her reactions which are very subtle. There are times when I don't know if she has even reached an O. Indeed she could be faking sometimes, how would I know?

Until I have a job again I really can't have my foot out of the door, so any kind of an ultimatum is on hold for now. She is trying to meet my needs as she sees them. Until she sees desire as a two-way street it still won't be what I am truly seeking. I want something that she cannot give me.

Cinco