Just a quick note before I go to work - will talk more tonight if you aren't already away.
Think it will help you to consult with a lawyer to gather info - IMO people usually need more information before making decisions. It is called the "pre-contemplation stage" which leads to more directed thinking about what changes are needed to resolve the problem, thus the "contemplation stage". No changes yet but exploring possibilities which is what will help you decide "what you want" (chap 2? in DR book)
