I'm just not sure I'm up to it. Seems kinda lame after all of the stuff I've been through, but I'm just tired of fighting...for what I'm not even sure anymore.
I remember what a tough time you had when you first came here and how you wanted to contact OM and so I just wonder HOW this can ever work if they contact never stops? That little shot of "juice" will always be there...so in a sense there will never be closure on this. There will always be an opening for another round anytime either one gets the "itch." I mean whats the point? At this time I just don't feel like looking forward to a lifetime of "what ifs?" "where were yous?" and because there will ALWAYS be contact, this woman poking herself in the middle of my life forever. Today is not one of my "find the silver lining" days. Imagine that? I realize how much work its going to take and I'm just not convinced that either one of us has the will to do what it is going to take to make it out of this. I'm not sure that I'm up for contstant mountain climbing.
Last edited by Sugar and Spice; 03/20/0901:51 AM.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option