Friday is getting closer...how are you feeling about it? I don't think you will ever be doing backflips, but I think it will give you some peace.
Nice of you to keep inviting your wife...nothing wrong with that as long as you never have any expecations. Whether she goes or not is not a sign of her coming back or R.
Doing great!!!
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I have been having great days! Thanks for checking in on me! Super busy, but the week has gone very fast.
So, I was talking to someone about W's tires, and got thinking about spring coming, and rain, etc - her tires are BALD, I mean, as bald as they can get. I'm not sure how she doesn't spin out.
So, I texted her today that she needed to get them replaced badly - she is carrying my VERY precious cargo around with her alot, and she transports people for her job.
Anyway, she immediately called me, and asked me where to get tires, and so on - I suggested a couple of places, and some suggestions on the types of tires. She bought her car from a younger kid, and it has big fat tires on it - probably $150/apiece. He put on custom $300 19" rims, etc - it's not really pimp, but close.
Anyway, she talked and talked and talked - told me that she was coming back from the new job and getting a physical exam, and she stopped and gave blood, and she has some really good type of blood so they love it when she comes in. So, she was apparently killing time.
Of course, the last time she went on a date with OM - she met him in the same town where she is getting this new job. It's still an hour and 20 minutes from him, but of course, I'm suspicious. Oh well, doesn't matter at this point really.
So, I kept saying, "Well, Ok..." like I was hanging up, and she kept thinking of stuff to tell me, and she finally had to go.
So she texted me asking if tire places took payment plans. Heh, I had no idea, I've never financed tires before.
Then she texted, "Never mind, it doesn't matter." Me: "Why?" W: "I make $8.25 an hour! I can't even afford one tire!" Me: "How much are they?" W: "It doesn't matter, I will talk to you later."
So, HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Welcome to the real world baby!
She leaves a home where she doesn't work at ALL, and she has no requirements other than being a mom and a wife - and now piddles around on that. Of course, she gets food stamps or something, and the gov't pays for all of her schooling, but still!
I'm guessing at this point that she's mad at me - it is all my fault she doesn't make much, and it's my fault that she need tires, etc.
Oh well, life goes on! FYI - the deadline is tomorrow at 4:45pm EST - when W drops off kids, so I'm ready!
I told her I was filing before, and she said she almost had a dissolution settlement ready, so I said I would wait until Friday (tomorrow).
Journaling:
I gave W a check for the kid's tuition almost 3 weeks ago. She STILL hasn't given it to the school - kept forgetting. During our call this afternoon, she mentioned it, and then she said later on she couldn't find it.
I got a call from the school administrator so I just wrote another check, and texted W to see if I could drop it off as I have to leave early in the morning.
She said she wasn't at apartment and would be gone for awhile - I asked her when she'd be back or if I could leave it somewhere. I figured she was out with OM, but she told me to just come meet her and kids at Kroger (grocery store).
So, I went. I loved it because I snuck in, and just stood there, and S6 was day-dreaming, just walking, and he saw me and did a double-take and his eyes got huge, and he screamed, "DAD!" and came running, and jumped up in my arms. Man, that'll make you just melt. Then, D8 came running and gave me a hug - no scream, but she's a little more reserved. I had to get a couple of things, so W let S6 come with me.
So, I got my stuff. I did finally get confirmation that W does have food stamps. How sad to go from a virtually unlimited grocery budget to living off other people's taxes.
So we walked out to the W's car, and I was just talking to kids, and they were telling me about some Irish music CD W had gotten for St. Patrick's Day, and they thought it was awesome. So, I said "Cool". Then I was heading to my car, and W called me back and said, "The kids want you to hear this." So I got in her car, and she played it, and was just talking to me.
It was odd too - S6 piped up, and said, "Can Daddy come eat dinner with us?" and W said, "No..."
Something I realized as well - OM didn't come over this week for their ritual "game night", and W doesn't have school or anything until next weekend, so it's not like there was a time problem or something. Dunno, not going to read anything into it.
Oh, and I forgot a section in the earlier conversation. W had been all excited about this new job - she was going to make enough where she'd have to work about 1/3 the hours, and make the same amount, but she could only work every other weekend, so she was going to keep her current job on alternating weekends. But her boss called and said that she was only going to get 7 hours shifts instead of 14-16 hour shifts like she had before.
So, she needs to drop $350 in tires, she says she's "broke", she might get screwed at work, OM is "criticizing" her, and they took the week off.
Sheesh.
So, just more weirdness - I guess it's good to go out with a bang!
W had been all excited about this new job - she was going to make enough where she'd have to work about 1/3 the hours, and make the same amount, but she could only work every other weekend, so she was going to keep her current job on alternating weekends. But her boss called and said that she was only going to get 7 hours shifts instead of 14-16 hour shifts like she had before.
So, she needs to drop $350 in tires, she says she's "broke", she might get screwed at work, OM is "criticizing" her, and they took the week off.
I was going to ask you about this. You're stuck betweeen a rock and a hard place. If you buy tires for her, it's a slippery slope and she may start to hit you up for more things because they are kid related. However, it is a dangerous situation for the kids. Dunno.
Can you offer her a loan? Or buy her tires in lieu of some other expense that is further off so she can save up the money?
Since I don't have kids I'll defer to others who may have been through this.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
