WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 5

[MrBond]

"I don't think she pressing to go as fast as possible, but she's not stalling either. She seems to be trying to let it skate through "under the rader". My therapist thinks she's trying to move it along without getting me angry."

I disagree to a point. I think she's doing it slowly so that she can strengthen her resolve at each point. The reason is because things could be seemingly going great between you two, but then she drops another mini bomb on you.

"I'm tempted to wait till I come back as I'm not sure how it will play out if I drop the bomb on her and then leave with the boys for the weekend. Not sure if being concerned about that really makes sense though."

You can tell her that you think a physical separation would do you both good since that is what she wants and that she can take the weekend to think about what she wants to do. She doesn't necessarily have to be gone by the weekend. The key is to make her think on things. Maybe with you and the kids gone, she'll start to feel the loneliness. That plus the added threat of her leaving because you asked her to will have her looking deeply into what she wants.

"I still believe in the marriage and that it can work. I do love you and feel that if you want to leave, you should leave."

Take out the last sentence and change it to something like "I love you very much, however I cannot make you love me. I love you enough that if you wish to be free, then you can go. I am not holding you back.

"I feel what's best for the kids is to provide as much stability as possible and that means keeping them in the family home. I know that I will be able to take care of them and the house."

Maybe change to: "While you go on your own personal journey to find out what you want, the kids need as much stability as possible and that means keeping them in the family home. I know that I will be able to take care of them and the house."

Then leave it up to her. I don't know...just my .02.