Yeah I know your right. i am just impatient and lonely for love. No doubt about it, my H adored me until I did the nasty on him. i miss that support and intimacy.
Sorry I'm late to the party, had my furnace issues to deal with.
Silva, I will agree with JD on this one. Please don't rush into a relationship. I don't want to see either you or this woman hurt because you aren't ready for this.
Don't get me wrong, I fully comprehend the rush of excitement when someone of the opposite sex tells you how wonderful you are. But there is a difference between feeling appreciated and getting involved. You need time to work on yourself and get to a place where you are happy with yourself and comfortable being alone. Only then will you be able to enter a healthy relationship.
Sorry to get all Dr. Phil on you. Just repeating what my counselor told me.
Polly, I have talked on my thread (I think) about using male attention to regain some self confidence. I lap up the newfound attention I'm getting from men. But I feel like I'm using it like a crutch. My counselor said it's a normal reaction and it's ok as long as I realize that I'm not ready for another relationship at this point.
So that's what I do. I flirt but not seriously. Tawnya is right, it's nice when the cute guys flirt back. Or like tonight when the bar manager paid my dinner bill for me. But I know that I'm not ready nor do I want a new relationship right now. I'm still undecided as to whether or not I ever want another serious relationship. That's the flip side. I never want to go through this pain again so I don't know if I'll ever be willing to risk it. More work to do on me.
Sorry if that came across as threadjacking, I just feel very strongly about this topic and I feel that true friends will speak their mind when the situation warrants it.
(((Silva))) hope you take this as it's intended, with love.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
I am not 'rushing' anything though, I am perfectly happy on my own and need my space. There is no way I am going to get or be hurt again if I can possibly help it. I wasn't / am not looking for a relationship, merely going with the flow.
Another odd thing, there is no 'rush' of a new realtionship about it, I can't really explain myself. Maybe I have DB'd myself that well that I am just happy whatever?!
However, I really do apprecaite you guys and what you say and of course will listen. Thanks, you are all wonderful
I was married for 2 years when I was 20 (way too young) this one broke down mutually and I was back on my own again.
After 6 months I met my current W and had been together 26 years in total when she ran off. So, I know all about second chances, marriages and relationships and commitment (rebound or not)
This time it's now been 8 months and I am happy on my own and in my own skin. Anything over and above that is a bonus
Pollyanna...I didn't answer your question, I do apologise!
No, you are not meant to be optimistic just because I have been on a couple of dates, what I was meaning is that the optimism itself brought me to where I am.
Misery finds friends easily and breeds. Optimism kills misery.
I was made redundant a month ago, saw it as an opportunity and looked upon it as a chance to do whatever I wanted for the first time in 26 years and felt good about it. I ws optimistic for the future. Within 24 hours I had another job, where I am now and it is the best place I have worked for absolutely years.
THAT'S what I meant.
Find the opportunity for good in everything and only good will find you. Perspective.
Oh, and again people, thanks for looking out for me, I am not jumping in with both feet despite my earlier posts. There has to be a long way to go for me to lose myself into another relationship. The last one I was in I was co-dependent and I am NEVER going there again.
Glad you had a great weekend with the 'friend'. IMO, just be friends for right now and see what happens. No rush.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
We are remaining as friends, albeit good ones. She is divorced and has had a bad time over the last 12 months and we have talked about everything so both of know where we are going.
Something wbout it just feels 'right' though. So we are seeing how it goes.
There is no way that I am going to let myself get into the same position I was in with my W. I was WAY too addicted. I like my space too much now anyway.
