Divorce is Hell.....Custody too

[HSSweetheart]

So sorry. I know, my situation could be much worse, I hear situations every week at my support group that make me grateful. NO parent should EVER take kids away from the other who are not in danger. PERIOD. My brother had it happen also. Ex wife took 2 yr old daughter away and he didn't see her again until she was 5. Went to some other state so he didn't even know where they were, got served papers in the mail. Really bad. And there was nothing he could do. Hang in there! Fight for your rights.

[HSSweetheart]

Spent 1/2 my Friday the 13th interviewing lawyers. Spent the second half of the day crying about the whole thing. Yipee. What a great day this was.......

[lynn08]

So sorry you are having a hard day Going to lawyers offices, dealing with paperwork, just makes it all feel real. I know how you feel. I had to go and meet with my L today to.

Hope things get better for you!

[confusedinpa]

HSS,

Sounds like you're working through your situation as best as possible. I'm actually not that far from you and the lawyer (he's in norristown) I got is really good and priced better than other's I've talked to. Not sure how to get you a private message as I don't want to post this type of info.
Perhaps someone can tell me how send the info privately.

[HSSweetheart]

Thanks all, I had a really hard day Fri and picked a lawyer I had seen way back in the beginning, a year ago.

H texted me that D9 is getting to be a spoiled brat, wants to "work with me" to parent her. I didn't answer. Then got another text that said he wants to share the kids no matter what, but don't think because you are the mom or because I left that you will get sole custody!

These are the kinds of threats I get from him on a regular basis. He thinks he can control me, and not knowing what my plans are are killing him. I will NEVER try for anything other than what is fair, and 50/50 is fair to the kids. I have told him that a million times, I won't waste the breath anymore. I have morals and a conscience, I won't take him to the cleaners, even if he had anything to take.....

[HSSweetheart]

Spoke with H yesterday after D9 told me she was spending the weekend with her father. I talked to my L then texted him that I approved no schedule changes. He asked if he could call me, said he would not rant or argue. I said ok if you are civil or I will hang up. Had a pleasant conversation. Told him I don't want to argue about anything, there will be no need to go to court about anything. I told him he needs to tell S12 that although he wants to be with his father he should be with me on my visitation days. Lately I haven't gotten my 50%. So we'll see where that goes, I have my doubts. Then I got stood up last night by a date. Really upsetting. Dating sucks, this is not where I thought or wanted to be at my age.

[bluerain]

HSS, I don't know if your phone will do it, but I can assign different ring tone to people in my phone book. I changed my H's ring tone to silent... He sucks, so he doesnt get a ring tone. Or maybe you can just change the text notification to silent, if it upsets you then maybe taking away some of its power will help.

I'm sorry things are so hard right now, really, they will get easier.

[HSSweetheart]

I caved and let H have the kids for the weekend. Went to get them Sunday and S12 said he wanted to stay. H supports him. I was furious. Went home crying. Called my Lawyer yesterday and told him I want custody done FIRST. My kids are all I have. Nothing else matters. Why is everything in life a fight?????

[HSSweetheart]

Now that school is out S13 has no reason to come stay at home and with wasband telling him he is old enough to decide where he wants to stay, I haven't barely seen him in months and now not for over a week. One of his 5 turtles here died Wed. I called to tell him. Yesterday we texted back and forth about it, I told him the turtles were his responsibility and soon the other 4 will be dead, he has to bury this one. He said Kiss my ass. Great to hear from your child, huh? I called my lawyer to again push for custody, I have NO rights right now to see my own child AT ALL. Even loser parents get every other weekend. I understand a boy at that age bonds with his father, but what am I, chopped liver?????? I did nothing wrong. His father left me. I stayed home, in our house, caring for it and my family and what do I get for it? At every turn I continue to be seen as the bad guy. It hurts deeply. I didn't want my marriage to end and I certainly did NOT want to lose either of my kids. D9 is still sticking with me. At least the 50% I have her home which is good. Why do I have no rights? Divorce is hell. I just want this to be over and to have my kids and stop hurting. Well, I don't think till the day I die I will ever feel an end to all the pain from D. I even have a new guy in my life but the pain doesn't disappear. Rejection is forever.

[dday101798]

HSS,

I'm so sorry to hear about the wedge between you and your son.

Now that my D is final, I'm in the same boat, mater of fact the situation the same, I was left, I stayed in the house, I lost the kids, the whole 9 yards.

Your son, like both of mine, is old enough to one day see through to the truth, and some day he will. For now, it hurts like hell, yes it does, I know. But, also as a child of a broken family myself, know what I say is true, and some day, your son WILL know you are not the 'bad guy' here.

One thing tho: "I told him the turtles were his responsibility and soon the other 4 will be dead, he has to bury this one. He said Kiss my ass. Great to hear from your child, huh?'

Umm, a lot can lost in translation of written word, and reading how what you wrote here is worded, that came off pretty cold (borderline bitchy) on your end and deserved a cold response in return. I highly suggest you call him and clarify your intent.