Thanks Kel, you're right about the healing. We're supposed to meet tomorrow night, I totally pushed for it but I'm too emotional and angry so I'm just going to say we'll talk next week. Maybe I don't want to face it? Wait you see, he'll have build himself up to get it over and done with lol. His mum said well I think things aren't going well, you need to move on. excuse me, 4 weeks, glad he can confide in you. anyway, not going to answer the phone from her either as it's all bit awkward for her too. I'm getting a little stronger every day :-) hope you are well. my return button is stuck
Hi guys, Regrets, it sounds like you are doing much better and you are in a better place in your mind. Good for you.
Kel, What you said about them "doing this" to us, etc. is so on the mark. I still can't believe all of the stuff my H is doing to me and my kids. However, I keep trying to change it in my mind to tell myself that he is doing these things because there is something wrong with him. It has nothing to do with us. The things he does are just because he is messed up and he's doing it to himself. In the end, who loses? They do.
It's so nice to come on here and read that I am not alone and other people are going through the exact same thoughts and feelings that I am. Sometimes you feel like you're the only one and nobody else in the world understands.
Feel free to stop by my thread titled "I think I'm done". Have a good day guys! M
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
Kel, What you said about them "doing this" to us, etc. is so on the mark. I still can't believe all of the stuff my H is doing to me and my kids. However, I keep trying to change it in my mind to tell myself that he is doing these things because there is something wrong with him. It has nothing to do with us. The things he does are just because he is messed up and he's doing it to himself. In the end, who loses? They do.
You don't so confused to me at all. Maybe it's time you changed your username.
Well he came round last night, aid it's over. Said now we need to discuss where to go from here. He wants to but me out, he has it all planned. I was very calm and said I was sad and disappointed that he didn't speak to me sooner and that the way he handled the whole thing was needless and cold.
He doesn't care though, still denied affair was anything to do with it. Now saying it was months ago that his feelings changed. He was matter of fact, shrugged his shoulders. still wearing ring which was bit strange for someone so sure.
Anyway, I need to start recovering and I need to accept that either we never did have the relationship I thought we did or that it simply wasn't meant to be.
I honestly do not know where it all went wrong and it worries me for the future. Maybe the answers will come and I'll realise that it wasn't all that great a relationship. just can't see it right now.
Need to get to solicitor asap as I think this may turn nasty
He doesn't care though, still denied affair was anything to do with it. Now saying it was months ago that his feelings changed.
Of course he did. You'd at least think these people could come pu with something ORIGINAL, wouldn't you?
Regrets, I'm sorry, but perhaps this is for the best at least for now. The man needs to get some help, for his drinking and for his habitual behavior in general. This relationship was NOT an emotionally healthy place for you right now.
Well he came round last night, aid it's over. Said now we need to discuss where to go from here. He wants to but me out, he has it all planned.
Now THIS is the hill upon which you make your stand.
Yes, get a good family law solicitor -- preferably one who specializes in "women's rights" issues. There is NOTHING that says you need to go along with the plan and the marital endgame that the TWO of them have planned for YOUR marriage.
In fact, it's time they began to get a good dose of REALITY injected into their fogged out, irresponsible lives.
Please keep us posted on the legal front. While it's not MY specialty, there are a whole lot of good smart folks here who can help you.
