Good point there, Stuck, re the MC. The odd thing is that she came recommended by a divorce attorney, so I suspected she'd be moderately pro-divorce.
It's not MC's "belief" in M that concerns me -- assuming that's correct; she hasn't told us anything about her views -- but the near-aggressiveness with which she promotes it.
It's bad enough "dragging" W to these sessions when she's "done" and has "made up her mind" and has "gone through this grieving" and is "ready to move forward" and is "tired of being in limbo" (one month of "limbo" -- oy!).
But then to have her made more defensive by MC, who's (theoretically) supposed to be facilitating some kind of improvement in our dialog and R (broadly defined) is a nuisance.
Struck me overnight, tho, that MC *did* have a good point on this friendship concept. W and I agree that we need to be better "friends," for lack of a better term, for the benefit of the kids.
MC asked what that meant. Neither one of us quite got that question, but now I do.
I say things here and to my "spiritual adviser" (my tennis buddy) that I would no longer say to W; she says things to her gf that she wouldn't say to me.
THAT is friendship. W and I get along well enough; we laugh; we model appropriate adult behaviors for the children. That isn't friendship, but it's not a bad post-D demonstration, either.
So maybe there isn't a friendship here to be cultivated. On this I must consult with my DB Coach (unpaid endorsement!), because DB Coach has talked about friendship as an important step.
