WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 5

[confusedinpa]

Just catching up on my journaling for the day. I was in a staff meeting from 7:30 AM to 12:30 PM

As I had mentioned, my wife was in full blown WAW mode this morning. It seemed like she wouldn't even look at me. I did wind up giving her a hug before I left and kissed her on the check.

I had set the boundary, so I asked her to try to let me know when she may be back tonite. She said she would.

Earlier this morning she text me that the thing tonite was canceled. I text her back and tried to be empathetic by saying she must be disappointed as she had really been looking forward to it. I also asked her what happened. She tried to call me back, but since I was in a meeting, I just text her saying I couldn't pick up since I was in a meeting. She then text me that her girl friend was running late so she would have to work late. She did recognize how I rearranged my thing with my buddies though so she could have gone. I empathized again. Then we bounced a few text back and forth just joking around.

Un/fortunately my boss snapped at me to turn off my phone as he said it has buzzed about 30 times.

Maybe it was good thing since it gave me a chance to go "dark" for a little bit.

I also just got off the phone from a recruiter with an interesting opportunity about 2 hours away. It could be a good fresh start for me. Close enough to visit whenever I wanted to, but far enough away for me to get a life. We'll see how it goes.

She did wind up texting me again "I oughta punch you in the nose hopscotch" about 2 hours later - my 3 year old has been saying it non-stop since he saw Nite at the Museum about 2 weeks ago. Unfortunately, he actually punches whoever is nearby in the nose. Doesn't bother me at all as it gives me a chance to practice my Kenpo blocks, but my 7 year old and wife has had ice packs on their noses almost everyday. Pretty funny in my mind.

Which reminds me I should text her back as that was almost an hour ago.

I still don't know what is really going on other than over the weekend she really pressed the custody agreement as she said she really wanted to move out. I'm actually annoyed with my lawyer as I haven't heard from him in a week.

Oh well, whatever.

I'm still having a good day and look forward to seeing my kids tonite (didn't really get to see them last nite as we had gone to counseling). I was planning on taking them out to a resturant that me and boys liked, but with my wife home tonite, I'll still have a good time with them.

I appreciate everyone's optimism of my situation, but really feel that I'm on the divorce train and it is out of my control.

I felt like I monopolized most of the counseling session yesterday and my wife didn't say too much. Not sure if that's a good thing or not. My plan had been to get her to talk more about current positives/changes - trying to break the cycle of rehashing the past hurt/pain. Seems like a good strategy to me, but curious of what other people think

I will continue to work on me for me and the boys. I have my next therapy appointment tomorrow so I'll talk to the therapist some more.