You are doing the honorable thing by being there for your H when he is hurt. However, I agree with you. Its OW or you. Not both. And you have every right to disrespect her. After all, she is disrespecting your entire family.

Better to just stay away as long as she is there.

Kevin

Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...