The wife never totally fest up to the fact that she bought tickiets to see a band in a tiny night club in a city 3.5 hrs. away on a wednesday night, April 8th. She did tell me on Saturday that when she bought the tickets she asked one of her female coworkers, but pretty much new she would not want to go seeing as it is a work night and a long drive. So, she asked Matt to go as well if her female friend declined. She then said she new I would have wanted to go, but she did not want me to go with her because she wants to get to know the band members, drummer in particular. She said that if I were there she would be unlikely to go and talk to the band members because my presence doesn't allow her to be herself. So that's why she had not told me. In addition, she knows how it destroyed me when she told me that she bought tickets and made plans with Matt the first time without telling me.
How do I deal with this?
She I tell her I think it's inappropriate for her to go with him?
She i talk to Matt and tell him I think it's inappropriate?
I think you should either LAUGH at that answer, and tell her how ridiculous it is, or you should put your hand up in the "stop" position and say "Stop it. You're insulting my intelligence, and it's disrespectful and i'm not going to listen to it."
YES, tell her it's inappropriate for her to go with him, and to continue to have contact with him.
NO, do NOT contact him about this or anything else. It will only serve to elevate him in importance.
I just looked at our bank statement for the month of Feb. and totalled up the cost of all the concert tickets my wife has been buying, 482.00
This is despite the fdact that i am out of work, we just filed bankruptcy and she is constantly telling me we have no money.
I have been telliing her I have holes in my shoes and I haven't bought myself any new clothes in 2.5yrs., BECAUSE WE HAVE NO MONEY. Yet almost every time my wife goes to costco she buys new clothes, and that's the cheap stuff, that doesn't include when she has been shoipping a bunch of other times.
{{{Working}}} YOU are so right about Puppy..PUPPY rocks and you are so fortunate to have his great advice..it IS tough..but he is so smart on this stuff!!!
UGH..that stuff about the bank statement is so typical of these scenarios..my husband spent like $1800 over Christmas NOT on our kids at all, but on a trip to visit his parents and the other woman's parents for 5 days..yep..LOL..unfortunately that seems par for the course during this "selfish time"
Tawnya
Me:39 H:40 D18/S12 M20/T21 Bomb 10/11/08 One Two Three Four
I do know that everyone talks about trying to protect yourself financially as best as you can...I dunno the best way to do that in this sitch?!
If you think it's time to talk to a lawyer, it certainly couldn't hurt to find out your options, especially given that bank statement, definitely take that with you.
Tawnya
Me:39 H:40 D18/S12 M20/T21 Bomb 10/11/08 One Two Three Four
WoM: You need to protect your assets when the WAS is in the selfish phase. My W spent $30k and milked me for another $55k before she left for Germany. She came back on a "hunting" trip (to get more money) a few weeks ago and sold her 2003 fully-loaded Eddie Bauer Edition Expedition for $9k.
Fortunately, by that time I had closed the joint accounts and cards and transferred my remaining assets to an individual account. You should definitely look into some legal advice for your sitch and state, because they don't have any thought for the future -- they are only thinking about the now and having fun and partying and having their independence (from you!)
The good news is that it does eventually pass, but you will be in the poor house when it does unless you man up and cut them off.
Last edited by PortlandDad; 03/17/0912:27 AM.
Me40 WAW37 M18 T20 S18,14 D13 EA Bomb 6/08 Sep 11/20/08 Ret 08/09 Sep/Filed 11/09
