#1 They are confused and emotional right? They don't even know whats happening. You will learn not to believe most of what comes out of their mouth anyway. (think) Blah Blah Blah.
#2 It just ticks them off and pushes them further away.
There isn't much you can do to speed this up or snap her out, but the more you aggrivate her and let her focus on you, the longer it will take her to work this out.
