This is a completely difficult spot to be in, I'm sure. You know there are feelings there, but you also know he's not acting on them either.
I agree w/an earlier poster who said xBF is able to work this his way w/little risk on his part. As long as there is no risk for him, there is no reason for him to make a decisive move.
Here is a story may make some sense to you about my father: My father and my step-mother dated for over 20 years (yes, the man had two former marriages and I guess he was hesitant to jump into a 3rd). Anyway, my step-mother met someone, out of the blue, and they began to have feelings for each other. She was considering leaving my father b/c he wasn't open emotionally to her, even after 20+ years.
So, once my father learned there was another suitor, he had to make a decision - let down his guard or lose the woman he loved. She's my step-mother now, so you can guess how this turned out. The point is, until my father had a risk involved, he didn't have to do anything. I think your xBF is the same way.
Does that mean you should find a man to make him jealous and force him to act? No, b/c that wouldn't be like you and would be dishonest. However, if one comes along, you know, out of the blue, I do hope you won't shy away from it.
You also said: "Been doing lots of thinking..." and that's what worries me, Love. No, seriously, you are in a place where I wasn't fortunate enough to be in. I'm not sure what to tell you to do, but the more you can find the way to move forward emotionally, the better you'll be.
As for posting, I think this forum is great as a journaling source. However, it is public, so you will have your "thoughts" read and analyzed a bit. As long as you keep in mind that we're all looking out for each other, this is fine. However, if you get to the point where you are tired of "advice" then taking a break is completely understandable.
Finally, you said:
Quote:
I think I am stuck in one of the stages of grief and I need resolution.. thats what I was posting before, I cant try and get that until I finish my college work. That just has to take precedence.
Kind of like Dante's Hell, eh?
I agree w/you that you very well may be stuck and resolution is exactly what you need. The question is, how do you get resolution and when? If you need to finish your school work, is it possible to put your resolution needs "out of mind" as best as possible until that is done?
If not, then you may want to look at getting your resolution finished regardless of where you are w/your school. Subconsciously, you may be using school as a crutch to avoid the resolution b/c the answer may not be what you (and all of us here) are hoping to hear.
Do you have a Spring Break coming up? That may be an opportunity to "finalize things" a bit.
Again, just my observations, so take them for what they are worth (or throw them out if they are worthless).
Still in your corner and not planning on vacating any time soon, Princess.
No, seriously, you are in a place where I wasn't fortunate enough to be in. I'm not sure what to tell you to do, but the more you can find the way to move forward emotionally, the better you'll be.