Like you, I was not closely involved in my daughter's life. This was a big problem. We now spend much more time together as a family (as well as father/daughter time). I'm ashamed to say it, but BEFORE the separation, I felt like I was wasting my time when I spent time with my family. Owch! It hurts to say that now. But now I go to kids' movies. I go to church. I go to kids' birthday parties. I can't say I love doing these things, but I recognize the importance of having fun with my wife and daughter. The recognize that the time we spend together helps make us a functioning family. This is huge.
I'm glad when I read your first thread that you're making a bigger effort to spend time with your daughter. Kids are like sponges. They're waiting to suck up information. Your daughter's likes and dislikes will be formed to a great extent by your own likes and dislikes. This is your time to share your life with your daughter and help forge her interests. No, she won't like everything that you like. But I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at how open she is to your interests.
My daughter watches old movies with me. She is now even quite fond of Harold Lloyd silent comedies. And she likes going hiking in the wilderness (she says she wants to be a scientist). No, she refuses to watch Frankenstein movies, and thus far she won't go caving with me. But that's okay. (And I suspect she'll come around eventually!)
me: 50 w (waw): 45 daughter: 9 m: 16 t: 19 bomb: 9/26/08 status: physical separation for 7 weeks, then work-in-progress R
