Basic rule...if you simply can't forgive then don't bother.
And by forgive, I mean not bring it up in arguments, not throw it in his face. If you say I forgive you, you have to let go of it. Forgetting it? that's unlikely, but forgiving? Hard but possible.
If your proof is undeniable...then well that's a hard row to hoe. Where are you getting your proof? Someone 'helpful' to your cause? Examine motives if that is the case.
Quote:
he's telling me he wants us to work things out.
Boundaries. Set them up. I told my wife when we got to this point, "If he is in your life, I won't be at all." I knew there was going to be some contact, mostly on his part, and there was, it did take some time to kill it all, and it had to be on her terms. However if that contact had been PA at all again...curb baby. But those boundaries existed because she wanted to work on us.
I see some similariteis in your sitch and mine...and no, sorry. I'm in the MLC archive, I don't like reliving the past and having my wife wonder why I'm in a funky mood when I come home. : )
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
