I'm going to just start making comments along the way. If I wait until I reach the end, I'll forget what I want to say. I hope this doesn't mean I'm simply rehashing. Maybe. I hope not.
About your daughter in bed with your W ... Yeah, that was my situation. It was a huge problem. However, that was one of my wife's main concessions when I moved back home. We wrestled with this subject for ... ever since my daughter was born. It absolutely crushed our intimacy. When my W and I sat down and made lists of what we wanted to change in our marriage, this was at the top of my list.
In my wife's defense, though, this was a problem because I wasn't going to bed at the same time as she was. She went to bed at 9pm. I was staying up late (near midnight). I had to totally concede on this issue. I changed my bed time so I went to bed with my wife. I started going into work much earlier. This has made a huge difference. My W and I spoon. We fall asleep together. This seems to set the stage for greater intimacy.
You've already found this out, right? I'm going to get to your more recent threads and found you've already done everything I've suggested.
Sorry.
me: 50 w (waw): 45 daughter: 9 m: 16 t: 19 bomb: 9/26/08 status: physical separation for 7 weeks, then work-in-progress R
